Paper Boating, Again

Oh good, they’re trying the paper boat thing again. I’ve just been wondering what I’m going to do with my weekend now that I don’t work them any more, so I guess this is my answer. Usually I’ve had to be satisfied with just watching videos afterwards on Me-Straw and laughing myself into an oxygen-deprived coma, but I might actually go down there this year and check it out for myself.

Oh, yep, good, it’s all happening on the official Melbourne Paper Boating Race website. ‘Our technology is getting better every year!’ ‘We’re sure to succeed with the new boating technology we’ve acquired.’ ‘Things definitely aren’t going to end in utter disaster this time, we think!’

And they still have the ‘support’ of outboard motor servicing, Melbourne area boating enthusiasts being the way they are, although from what I’ve seen that’s definitely based on pity. Those motor service people aren’t stupid… they just know that if they’re not there, then things will be even more disastrous. Still, I don’t envy them the task of explaining why an entire boat motor is not compatible with a boat made of paper, not matter how giant. And then they have to help with the fitting anyway (again, out of pity), and then see their whole work disappear with the rest of the vessels into the murky waters of the Melbourne bay.

Hey, maybe those weird treasure hunter people are actually onto something. There’s got to be a huge stack of outboard motors at the bottom of the ocean, and you could at least sell them for scrap if nothing else.

Anyway, I’ll be there in person this year, for this most important event for all of Melbourne. Anchor winch repair on standby, if anyone manages to get that far. It’s not that I DON’T want them to succeed, but it’s pretty funny when the boats begin to fall apart. As paper does, you know?